About 6 months gone with a child of cheddar

Sometimes, when I'm bored or fat, I like asking people this question -

'If there was a pill you could take, instead of eating, like a supplement once a day, would you take that instead?'

It surprises me, the amount of people that reply yes.

I read a quote once, I won't pretend to know who said it, and it was something like 'One of the very best things in life is that whatever you're doing, no matter how important, you must always stop and take time to eat'. HOW VERY TRUE.

Eating (next to sleeping) is one of my favourite hobbies, ever. (It's at this point that I look down and realise I've spilt sweet chilli sauce on my tshirt.) The cooking and preparing of it I'm not so keen on, but luckily I have been blessed with thoughtful and creative parents who don't mind making it for me, and a boyfriend who makes a pretty decent cheese toastie.

You have to eat to live, durr. But what I love is the variety of it all. It's a necessity, but it can be as simple - or as extravagant - as you want it to be. Take a jacket potato for instace - plain (boring, but healthy)..., baked beans, whatever, or how I'd eat it, which is loaded with butter, salt, pepper, and prawns. It's a heart attack on a plate but oh my god, it's so tasty. You can keep it casual or dress it up and eat the whore out of it. Mmmm. It's also a sociable thing - for many people the only time they get to sit down and talk to their family or partner etc. John pretty much lives on a diet of cheese, bread, sausage rolls and haribo (and still manages to stay skinny - bastard) but I will literally eat anything edible... with the exception of ravioli, and meat. But not fish. I am allowed to eat fish because I'm a hypocrite.

Anyway, last year, working at the pub full-time, I had some quite moronic punters (men... of course) asking if I was pregnant. And in fact, getting quite irate when I had the cheek to be offended and put them straight. At the time I was re-assured with comments such as 'It's the top you're wearing' or 'if you stood up straight, your tummy would be naturally flat'. This is bull-SHIT. Looking down now, there's definitely a bit of a bump there. Fortunately, I now don't care at all.

I spent all this past summer trying to diet for our holiday to Fuerteventura (incidentally, I didn't really lose any weight until arriving there and getting a stomach bug). It was pointless, all it did was make me grouchy and tired. At the end of the day, if eating a massive lump of cheese makes me happy, I might as well eat it. There's always that exercise bike in the front room if I get really desperate.

I read an interesting article in a magazine the other day. It was of a quite chavvy looking girl arguing her point against your 5-a-day, saying that life is short and there's no time for salad - she pretty much was living on kebabs and chips. Well, she weighed about 9 stone. It's alright for her then innit, lucky fast-metabolism-having COW. I like vegetables anyway. But you know... next to a pizza or in my halloumi and mushroom wrap at Nando's.

Or strawberries covered in chocolate.

For now I think I'll just check out the maternity range at Topshop and when people ask when my baby's due, just reply - 'Oh, I'm just really fat'. That seems to make them squirm.

Goodnight.